some jokes.

was on the boards at truehope and happened on a post from 2009. it brought me back and i remember how confadant i was then and how well i was emotionaly. i'm close now but  my hormones are taking me for a ride haha...

but in the thread was these two jokes.
1.
It was flooding in California. As the flood waters were rising, a man was on the stoop of his house and another man in a row boat came by. The man in the row boat told the man on the stoop to get in and hed save him. The man on the stoop said, no, he had faith in God and would wait for God to save him. The flood waters kept rising and the man had to go to the second floor of his house. A man in a motor boat came by and told the man in the house to get in because he had come to rescue him. The man in the house said no thank you. He had perfect faith in God and would wait for God to save him. The flood waters kept rising. Pretty soon they were up to the mans roof and he got out on the roof. A helicopter then came by, lowered a rope and the pilot shouted down in the man in the house to climb up the rope because the helicopter had come to rescue him. The man in the house wouldnt get in. He told the pilot that he had faith in God and would wait for God to rescue him. The flood waters kept rising and the man in the house drowned. When he got to heaven, he asked God where he went wrong. He told God that he had perfect faith in God, but God had let him drown.
"What more do you want from me?" asked God. "I sent you two boats and a helicopter."

2.
A woman who is in her nature grumpy, chronically hard done by, and never content is at the beach with her young son. She nags at him not to get sand in his shoes, not to get too close to the water, not to pick up nasty dirty shells and bits of seaweed and put them in his pockest. He is playing by the edge of the water when suddenly he is swept away by a freak wave. He cant swim, and she is certain he will drown.

In that moment, she realizes that she has wasted her life being negative and unpleasant and not appreciating what she has. She drops to her knees and begs God to return her son to her, in return for which she will dedicate the rest of her life to being grateful and will never complain about anything again. Miraculously, another freak wave deposits her son on the beach in front of her, unharmed, not even wet. The woman grabs her son and hugs him - and then holds him at arms length, looks at him and frowns. God says, okay, seriously, whats with the face? I gave you your son back, didnt I? And the woman says, he had a hat.